


Flames

by hereforthehurts



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: AU where Niki goes to FUCKING THERAPY and lives in snowchester with cara, Burnt Niki, F/F, F/M, Febuwhump, Fever, Found Family, Gen, Nightmares, Niki | Nihachu Needs a Hug, Niki | Nihachu-centric, Niki | Nihcahu redemption arc, Older Sibling Niki | Nihachu, Past Villain Niki | Nihachu, Sick Niki, Sickfic, Whump, fever whump, n sam, n tommy, they are a FUCKING FAMILY
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-16 13:54:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29333385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hereforthehurts/pseuds/hereforthehurts
Summary: In her dreams, Niki was still holding the flint in a hand, and steel in the other.In her dreams, she dreamt of the fire.She doesn't know how to escape from it.
Relationships: Cara | CaptainPuffy/Niki | Nihachu, Niki | Nihachu & Sam | Awesamdude, Niki | Nihachu & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Niki | Nihachu/Wilbur Soot, Past mentions of Niki | Nihachu/Wilbur Soot
Comments: 3
Kudos: 90





	1. in this fire

**Author's Note:**

> For febuwhump day 10; "i'm sorry, i didn't know". I read this au somewhere on tumblr and couldn't stop thinking abt it.. . . sobs. I wish Villain Niki a Very Redemption Arc <33
> 
> Au based on [this tumblr post!](https://hereforthehurts.tumblr.com/post/642099640123244544/crying-i-would-be-willing-to-write-this-au)

In her dreams, Niki was still holding the flint in a hand, and steel in the other.  
  
  
  
  
The sky was dark, smoke and ashes and debris flying around, burning her eyes. Craters and holes sprawled out as far as her eyes could see, destroyed buildings, a burning flag. Tommy and Techno’s screams in the distance, fighting over a nation that was long gone anyway.  
  
  
_It was never meant to be.  
  
  
_She grips on the sharp flint until she could feel a piercing pain in her palm, blood trickling down, dripping into her nation’s soil.  
  
  
  
_It was never meant to be._  
  
  
Wilbur is gone. Her land is gone. Her nation is gone. And as she stares into the distance, into the fire and the ruins, she could feel herself slowly going away, too.  
  
  
_It’s gone, it’s gone, it’s gone. It was never meant to be._  
  
  
She steps forward. The steel glistens under the fire that burns her land.  
  
  
_With bloodied hands and weakened knees, our people rise like the phoenix,  
  
  
_The voices in her head screams in approval as she moves forward in a trance. _  
_  
_  
Our empty fields and canals ‘round L’mantree  
_  
  
One flick, two flick. The fire sparks against the leaves before it lights up, and it burns, it burns the tree alive.  
  
  
_With sweat and trees we armed our ranks, we laid foundation in our lands  
  
  
_The fire reflects in her eyes, the green turning into a dead shade of black, as dead as her love, as dead as her nation. The logs turn into ash, and Niki lets it be.  
  
  
_And every lips from here to infinity_.  
  
  
_The tree_ , Niki thinks _, had survived six withers and a ridiculous amount of explosives. A war for the land around it, fire and axes and swords. But the one who finally brought it down to its knees, it was the girl who loved it the most.  
_  
  
_My L’manberg, my L’manberg, my L’manberg  
  
  
  
_

  
  
  
  
“Niki. Niki it’s okay, it’s okay.”  
  
  
_It’s not._  
  
  
“Niki, hey, _hey—_ ” There’s shushing all around her, an arm supporting the back of her neck, her limp body. “Niki, wake up.”  
  
  
The fire burns the tree alive, it burns her alive. Sweat soaking her body, tears streaming down her eyes like an everlasting waterfall.  
  
  
“Niki.”  
  
  
A cold, soothing fabric was placed below her head, her body easing into a soft mattress. _She doesn’t deserve this,_ she kept repeating. _She doesn’t deserve this, not after what she did to her nation, her loved ones, to Wilbur, to Tommy—  
  
_  
“Niki, shhhhh, it’s okay, love. Niki, I’m right here.”  
  
  
_You’re dead, you’re dead. Wilbur is dead. He’s dead._  
  
  
Something cold and wet presses against the heat on her skin, and she whines, flinching away. _She deserved to stay in the fire, she deserved to be burned, along with the tree. She deserved it. She deserved it.  
  
  
_Hushed conversations continue all around her. Her body was weak, aching, tired—she doesn’t know what was happening. The dark was all that she sees when she finally pulls herself away from her nightmare.  
  
  
“I’m sorry, Niki,” a familiar voice says. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t—I didn’t know.”  
  
  
  
She remembers the yelling match with Sam, the one that finally tired her out and made her collapse. About him not trusting her, even with everything she’s been through. _Can’t you see it?_ She had yelled with all the strength left inside her, _I’m trying! I’m trying to change! Why can’t you see that?  
  
_  
His face tells her that he doesn’t see anything in her except the angry, lost girl she is, the girl who burned down everything that was left of what she loved to the ground. He doesn’t see a single good thing in her.  
  
  
  
  
And to be honest, Niki deserved that. She deserved every bits of it.  
  
  
“I was—they were so worried, I,” She hears Sam continue to mumble, “you... you were yelling, and you just collapsed, and—shit, Niki, I’m so fucking sorry.”  
  
  
_It’s okay,_ she tries to say, but nothing comes out of her. Her body gave up on her, her eyelids feeling like it was being weighed down by an anvil. _It’s okay. You were right about me. I don’t deserve your trust, I don’t deserve any of this._  
  
  
“I—I know. I know you’re trying. Puffy can see it, Tommy can see it, and I’m sorry if I fail to see it too.” He says. “I’m sorry that what took me to realize this was you almost dying out of fever.”  
  
  
_It’s okay. It’s okay._  
  
  
“I—I should stop talking,” Sam sighs heavily. “I—get some rest, Niki. Tommy’s sleeping, and Puffy’s making potions for you, and I… I’ll keep watch.”  
  
“Forgive me,” Niki manages to whisper out, surprisingly coherent.  
  
Sam stares at her, startled. Then he stutters out, “I—of course. Of course, Niki. I’m sorry, too.”  
  
She nods. It was all she could do.  
  
  
  
  
And forgiving each other… that’s a start. A good one.

  
  
  
Niki closes her eyes and dreams about the fire that burns everything around her.  
  
  
_  
_  
  
  



	2. i missed your warmth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is for febuwhump day 11; hallucination !! It's found family time babey. Tommy and Niki as siblings <3

She floats in between her dreams and her wake, the past and the present. Most of the time, she couldn’t tell which was which—she’d dream about the fire and wake up to a cold washcloth pressed against her cheeks. She’d dream about the screaming and shouting and wake up to hushed voices, to the silence of their Snowchester cabin. She’d dream about Wilbur’s lips, his determined voice, his goofy, charming smile—  
  
  
—and wake up in Puffy’s arms. Her gentle touch, her soft smile, her voice telling her that she’s safe, that everything is okay.   
  
  
  
(It wasn’t.)  
  
  
Her fever wouldn’t go away. She remember being picked up, being settled down. Being fed and taken care of. And all she could think of was that _she doesn’t deserve this._  
  
She doesn’t deserve any of this.   
  
  


  
  
Her past keeps haunting her—the day her of the election, the day her nation went to war, the day Wilbur blew up L’manberg to pieces. The day the boy she loved died. The day she burned down the tree, _it always goes back to that tree._ The days she felt like drowning, like she was lost in the darkness with no way back. The day she would rather succumb into regret and grudge, the anger burning inside her like gasoline being lit on fire.   
  
  
It haunts her. It haunts her in her sleep. She couldn’t rest, no matter how sick and tired and drained out she is. _This is what she deserved._  
  
  
  
The day she lured Tommy into the forest, into the nuclear test site—pretending to be his friend, ignoring the searing hate in her chest. _You will have your revenge,_ she kept repeating. _You will have your revenge._  
  
She doesn’t.

  
  
 _Abort mission,_ Jack had whispered to her. _Tubbo is here. Abort mission, now._  
  
  
She doesn’t do that, either.

  
  
Instead, she drowns herself in that fire. She lunges so suddenly towards Tommy that the boy didn’t have the time to respond to her. All he did was scream before falling on his back, staring at her, choking and spluttering as her blade pierces into his chest.   
  
_“Why?”_ His big, blue eyes stared at her. _“Why…?”_

  
 _“Because! You—you’re the source of every bad thing in this place, Tommy!”_ She had cried as she watch him die. _“Every conflict, everything—you were the reason why L’manberg is gone, why Wilbur is dead—”  
  
“Wilbur,” _Tommy mutters, now staring into the sky instead, like he could see his brother right in front of him as he breathes his dying breaths. _“You—you loved him, didn’t you? D’you think—do you think Wilbur would want this, Niki?”  
  
“Don’t try to fucking—” _  
  
  
But he was right. Tommy was right.   
  
She pulls her blade from his body—Tommy yells out a pained scream.   
  
  
  
There’s blood in her hands. Red on her sleeves, her gown, the ground.   
  
  
She drives the blade back into Tommy’s heart before she opens her eyes and sat up straight, panting and shaking and _scared out of her mind._  
  
  
  
 _Tommy,_ her mind screams. _No, no, no. Tommy, Tommy no—_  
  
  
  
She drags herself out of bed, even when her legs buckled when she tried to use them. She stumbles onto the hard, cold wooden floor of her bedroom, mumbling and calling for Tommy, hoping that it was a dream, a fucked up dream that her mind made for her. _It’s not real, right? It’s not real. Not real._  
  
  
She looks down on and sees the crimson, red blood drenching her sleeves.   
  
  
  
She _wails._  
  
  
“ _Do you think Wilbur would want this, Niki? Do you?”_ Tommy kept screaming in her head. _“Do you think he’d still love you if he could see what you’ve become?”_  
  
 _“Stop,”_ she screams back. _“Stop, stop, stop—”  
  
_  
  
  
  
  
  
  
“Niki!”   
  
A pair of arms wrap around her. Soft, gentle ones, tugging her up to lean against someone’s chest. A pair of lips pressing on her forehead, calming shushes flowing out of them. “Niki, hey, _hey_ —you’re okay, love. You’re okay. Breathe for me. It’s okay.”  
  
 _“It’s not,”_ she yells, choking on spit and tears, “It’s not, it’s not, I’ve killed Tommy, I killed him, I—”  
  
“Niki, Niki it’s just a dream, it’s okay—”  
  
The room turns bright so suddenly, and she flinches under their arms. More shushes, quiet conversations she doesn’t have the energy to try to listen to. Then her body finally collapsing down under the fever—the wet washcloths, the potions, the slender fingers carding their way along her hair.  
  
  
 _She doesn’t deserve this. She doesn’t deserve this.  
  
  
“Tommy,” _she keeps trying to tell them, grasping on their shirt, “Tommy, Tommy—”  
  
  
“He’s right here, Niki,” another voice says, low and calming, “he’s right here. He’s okay.”  
  
  
“I’m here.”  
  
  
  
And it was, Tommy’s voice. Tired and sleepy and worried, but _alive. He’s alive._ “Niki, what’s wrong?”  
  
“I—I dreamt you—I—” she reaches for him, and he reaches back, wrapping his arms around him as she sobs into his chest. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”  
  
  
  
  
He doesn’t say that it was okay, doesn’t say that it wasn’t her fault. He just… held her there.   
  
  
And it felt… strangely, okay.   
  
  
“What did you dream about?” Tommy whispers hesitantly to her.  
  
“I—the tree, and the—war, L’manberg, Wilbur, the fire—” she tries to recall everything with hitched breaths. “And I—I killed you. I killed you and I woke up and I was so scared it was real, it felt so real—”  
  
“It’s not,” he cuts her off softly. “And you wouldn’t. You wouldn’t, now.”  
  
“He’s right, love,” Puffy whispers to her side, fingers carding the hair on the side of her face still. “Go back to bed?”  
  
She nods. _She’s so tired.  
  
“_Can you—can you hold her…?”  
  
“Yeah, I can do that,” Tommy nods, settling back into the pillows while she clings on him like a little child. “Go to bed, big sis.” He huffs out a small laugh when he says it. “I’ll be here.”  
  
“I’ll keep watch,” A lower voice suggests from the corner of the room. More quiet conversations, agreeing and conceding before Puffy finally rounds her arm over her body, sandwiching her in between.   
  
  
  
  
  
This time, she dreams of the fire that crackles on the fireplace of their cabin’s living room.   
  
  
  
  
“ _My L’manberg,”_ She hears Tommy sing while she drifts away, _“My L’manberg, My L’manberg…”  
  
_  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> ayo yell at me at [my tumblr blog !!](https://hereforthehurts.tumblr.com/)


End file.
